Beautiful Agony
by Saber Wing
Summary: Nield always said her compassion would be the death of her. Only now, at the end of her life, did she fully understand that. Obi-Wan x Cerasi


_**Author's Note: **_Okay, random idea guys, but I haven't seen anything like this, and I've always loved Cerasi. Sort of CeriWan, since I love that pairing. Not to be confused with Siri, just to make that clear. I hope I have done this brave young woman justice.

**Beautiful Agony**

**By: Angel Wings-008**

Nield always said her compassion would be the death of her. Only now, at the end of her life, did she fully understand that.

Cerasi fell to her knees as blaster fire tore into her chest, bright green eyes widening in a split second of searing pain; she expected that pain to consume her, but instead it seemed to recede. The unnatural numbness that replaced it was by far worse than any sort of agony. Was this what death was? Did it truly rob you of everything, even the deepest emotion and sorrow? A small part of her thought that was strange. Shouldn't she be sad? Shouldn't she be crying? It was a running joke between her friends that she must be some sort of mutant, for she had always been able to take more than most without breaking. Briefly, she wondered if their playful musings had been right.

Time came to a grinding halt; the shocked faces, the chaos of violence, even the scent of her own blood... it hardly seemed real. Even something as mundane as breathing proved to be a tougher task than she could manage. That knowledge was registered with a vague sort of fear, despite her determination, and the strange numbness consuming her. Gasping, rattling breaths were dragged into her lungs by sheer willpower alone. It wouldn't last; she knew it wouldn't.

She'd known this would happen, and she'd accepted it. How could she stand back and do nothing? The Hall of Evidence, horrific though it was, contained chunks of Melida/Daan's history that could be lost forever. Yes, the people of their planet had carried a terrible vengeance with them for far too many years, but if they were to demolish and forget that, it made them nothing more than cowards who ran from their pasts. She didn't want that for anyone. Even if it meant her death, she wanted children generations from now to know their origins and how far they had come. Perhaps with time, they could take pride in who they were and where they came from. For such a thing to happen, this chain of destruction had to end. Cerasi had to do her part, whatever that might be.

Slowly, inevitably, the seconds ticked by. Her time ran shorter with each forced, ragged breath, and she knew she was not long of this world. Cerasi wished she'd been able to see him one last time; watch him smile, touch his hand, gaze into those sweet blue eyes. Did she love him, even now? Did he feel the same?

Almost as if in a dream, Obi-Wan appeared at her side, tears gathering in that wonderful, earnest pair of eyes. She could hardly see him anymore, and yet at the same time, it was as if she was seeing him more clearly than she ever had. It was the most horrible, beautiful moment she had ever experienced, and though she'd never gotten the chance to ask, Cerasi knew he felt the same as she did. Obi-Wan had given up everything he'd ever known just for a chance to help her and the Young. What they shared with each other was special…no matter the distance between them, it always would be. She wished they'd had more time, but things didn't always work out exactly the way they wanted them to. As soon as she'd heard what Nield was planning, her fate had been sealed.

His lips moved as he shouted disconnected words, but she could scarcely hear them as he held his palm up to her for the last time. The veil of darkness descending upon her lifted for a moment, and she could see and feel as clearly as she always had; whether that was a blessing or a curse, she couldn't say. In a flash of overwhelming emotion, she wanted desperately to reach out to him, but try as she might, she couldn't quite manage to return the gesture of unity they'd perfected together. Already he was beyond her reach, and it broke her failing heart. If she'd had the strength, Cerasi would have cried, but she also would have smiled.

Yes…she loved him; that was why she knew he would protect the ideals she left behind. This world would heal, bloom, and grow again. All beings would eventually perish, but the cycle still moved on, withstanding the tests of time itself. It was the natural way of things…a beautiful agony.

Cerasi had faith in this seemingly hopeless world, even all light flickered out and plunged her into darkness.


End file.
